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Yaoi Inspired -- ADULT CONTENT! A Soldier’s Choice by D.L. Warner Chapter One The first time I held him in my arms was an accident. I grabbed Vincent to pull him back from the abyss. I could not believe it when I saw him lurching toward the edge on his damaged leg. He had done his job. We both gave almost all we had. The mission was finished. We had sent the hulking, fiery menace back to whatever hell it had come from. But Vincent was still trying to fight – still determined to punish himself. He would never admit to that, but he was punishing himself for still breathing when so many were not. I knew what he was doing because I, too, had been intent on self-destruction. He had the same haunted, guilty look in his eyes that I saw when I looked in the mirror each morning. It was wrong for him to feel that way. His transgressions were minor in the scope of that accursed conflict that tore him from our world. His life was worth more than that. Seeing Vincent again made me consider the possibility that mine was worth something, too. I grabbed him as he staggered toward that burning chasm. I used all the strength I had left to jerk him back against me. Momentum took us down the incline. I rolled over curling around his lithe body to shield him from other blasts. It was surprising that he didn’t fight me. The inevitable final explosion startled him. I pulled him closer. “I’ve got you, Vincent,” I murmured into his ear. “I’ve got you.” When the chasm fell silent, I carefully turned us over, but kept him close to my body. I managed to sit up against a large rock. Vincent was sprawled across my lap.Despite the pain, his closeness felt better than anything I could have imagined. “Don’t try to move. I don’t think either of us can get far,” I said quietly. “I wasn’t planning to,” he replied softly. Vincent pulled away lightly to look at me. His large, amber eyes were curious. I looked back putting all I felt into my expression. Vincent’s eyes widened in surprise and his cheeks flushed, but he did not avert his gaze. His regard grew warmer before he eased back against me and rested his head on my shoulder. I held him until our rescuers arrived to pull us apart. I didn’t see Vincent Greven for some time after that night. We were both hospitalized for many weeks. I’d gotten badly battered and cut up. Somehow, I didn’t re-injure what was just healed on the right side of my face. I had heard that Vincent had suffered something like the bends in coming back from the other side of the portal. He was hospitalized in a special wing working with Jenn Saxl, the base specialist on Altered physical therapy. I was not lacking for visitors though. The nurses fawned over me. I don’t think I’ve heard the word Colonel said so coquettishly. There must be something about a brooding man with a scar on his face that gets to the ladies. I overheard them saying amongst themselves that the thin, jagged line made my dark-haired good looks more mysterious. There was something tragically romantic about me now, I suppose. Then there were all the sponge baths. I may have felt like a pale, husk of my former self, but apparently my body was still the same as it ever was. The nurses weren’t my only visitors. My saner squad members were there frequently. While I was genuinely moved by their feelings toward me, it was hard to take the near desperate need in them for me to be the same man I was before the scars of two years ago. Their visits drained me more than my injuries most days. The next time I saw Vincent was at the military tribunal. He looked better than when I last saw him. His long blond hair was in its usual thick ponytail hanging past his shoulders. He wore loose fitting black training fatigues. Though the attire was like pajamas, I could still see the lines of his lean muscles. His angelic face was as fierce and determined as ever. Only I saw how haunted those amber eyes were. Our gazes connected just before the hearing. Again, I let all that I was thinking and feeling show for that instant.His eyes widened in surprise again. Though he blushed deeply, I saw understanding in those eyes. The hearing was mercifully short. The Tribunal glossed over our actions of two years prior in both our cases and, for once, sanely focused on our risking our lives to protect the government in dire circumstances. It was wise that they took that tact. I had a folder with plenty of proof that it was one of our own who had opened the portal between worlds two years ago in the hopes of finding even more power. We also had data from the probe vessel that came before the behemoth. Our invaders knew very little about Vincent Greven except that he had been thrust into their realm at the time the portal was opened. Apparently, they didn’t have custody of him long enough to even know he was an Altered. He and I had raised a lot of hell before Vincent disappeared, but we were in no way responsible for that thing attacking the city. The outcome could not have been more ironic. We lost nothing save for any hope of advancement in the military. Vincent was even granted his back pay for two years. I almost laughed out loud. Vincent never wanted a career in the military, and my own lust for power ended when he disappeared. We were left alone for a moment after the Tribunal filed out. I knew there wouldn’t be much time before our friends and colleagues rushed in. “Hardcase,” I murmured as I approached him. I let the fondness I felt color the use of that nickname. “Blitz,” He quipped in return. His smile was warm. “Look, Vincent, if you need to be somewhere quiet for a while,” I said extending my card. “I know what it means to need time...away from everyone...” “Thanks,” Vincent replied, gazing up at me with huge eyes. He was struggling to say something, but then we heard the others coming. “Thanks, Rik.” “I hope you two aren’t fighting,” Jenn Saxl said from the entrance. Her hands were on her hips. “They couldn’t be,” Ouida Remak, my assistant, quipped dryly. She eyed us both curiously. “The furniture is still in tact.” Almost everyone connected to us rushed into the room then. Most of the squad had not seen Vincent since he disappeared. He got hugged and tousled from one end of the room to the other. I don’t think anyone of them really heard the outcome of the hearing. Vincent seemed pleased to see everyone – especially his brother. Though the young man had hardly been far from Vincent’s hospital bed, there was a wonder in their expressions when they looked at each other, like they still couldn’t believe they found one another again. I also saw the same desperate need in everyone for Vincent to be the same boy they once knew. It was easy for me to see that he wasn’t. He had matured into a man. Physically, Vincent was as lithe and graceful and as deadly as ever though taller than anyone thought possible. His face was more defined. There were planes and angles instead of soft roundness. He moved with more sureness and less bravado.However, despite the strong jaw line that offset the huge eyes with the dark fringe of lashes and the pouty lips, Vincent was still more beautiful than handsome. He still had that heavy, silken golden ponytail. That was enough for most around him to still see the boy. I clearly saw the man. I also saw longing in Vincent’s last glance at me before he was hustled away to find lodgings. The next time I held him was by design. Those who know me well believe that I have absolute confidence in all my designs and schemes. This was never true where Vincent Greven was concerned. Mercurial didn’t begin to describe Hardcase. He earned that nickname his first week of advanced training. It was just as likely that he would run from his pain and from me to protect his loved ones. I had no idea if he would take me up on my offer or if we were even speaking the same language. Three days passed after the hearing. I was resting my battered body and mind and trying to figure out whether I could really put on that uniform again.I spent the third day reading and dozing and trying to ignore the liquor cabinet. That was getting harder to do each day.The knock was a blessed distraction from my own thoughts. I almost didn’t care who it was. Vincent Greven stood on my stoop with a rucksack in his hand. He gazed up at me with uncertain eyes. I had never seen him more vulnerable. “I...I...uh,” he began softly. “It was so crowded there...” “Come in, Vincent,” I said opening the door wide. He entered the house while giving me a long, sardonic, sidelong glance.“I hope you know what you’re doing. We could barely get through a debriefing without nearly coming to blows.” I laughed at that. It felt good to really laugh. “So what if we do?” Vincent nodded. He even smiled. “Where do I put my stuff?” “The bedroom. There’s space in the drawers and the closet,” I replied. After a few moments, Vincent ambled into the livingroom. The smart alec smirk was back on his face. His eyes had a sparkle to them. “You travel pretty light, Colonel,” he quipped. “You have about as much to your name as I do. And, there’s only one bed.” “A soldier never needs much. And the bed is of ample size,” I replied dryly. “I splurged on that. Besides, you still don’t take up much room.” Those nearly golden eyes flashed then. He almost responded with that infamous temper. A slow smile spread across his face instead. “I’ve grown up some, and you know it.” I knew Vincent was still an innocent in many ways, but the sensuality in his tone surprised me. My body responded, forcing me to clamp down. I had to handle him carefully. We were both too raw for this to blow up in our faces. I smirked in return. “You have a way to go to grow into that mouth, Hardcase.” “Maybe,” he replied easily. “Are your cupboards as bare as your closets? I’m starving.” I was relieved to find that Vincent was as mercurial as ever.He stalked into my kitchen and looked in all of my cabinets and the fridge. He whistled at what he found, then peeked at me. “Quite a spread here, Rik,” he murmured. “Were you that sure of me?” “Never, Vincent,” I replied softly. I ached to touch him then. “I could never be sure of you. I could only prepare as best I could and hang on...” Vincent liked my reply if his smile was any indication. “You did alright, Rik.” With that, he started pulling items out of the fridge and the pantry while dictating a list of equipment he would require. Finally, he slid a package of flank steak in my direction. “Thin slices,” he said as he placed vegetables in a row on his side of the counter. “You don’t have any garlic.” “Never liked the stuff.” “It’s good for you, and it can be sweet when it’s cooked right,” he replied while deftly chopping the vegetables. “We can pick some up tomorrow.” Something about that statement made my heart lurch. He would be with me tomorrow and we would be shopping. “Marketing?I just stocked up.” “We should have something fresh everyday,” he replied as he worked. “That’s good for me, too?” “Yeah,” he smiled. “The walk will do us both good.” “All this good food and walking made you grow?” “Maybe. I rested more than when I was under you,” he replied. It was an innocent response, but I nearly lost a finger reacting to it. “Be careful. You have too much gristle for this meal,” Vincent said playfully. I actually blushed under his sparkling gaze. “I’ve risked life and limb for this meal.Does this pass muster?” He looked over my work then nodded. “That’s good. Salt and pepper that. Have any red wine?” “For the dish?” “And for you,” he replied. “You need to relax.” “Brat,” I muttered as I left the room. “Geezer,” I heard him retort as I rummaged through the liquor cabinet. That made me chuckle though I was barely in my 30s. My heart felt lighter than yesterday or many days before that. The wine I found was a gift from my beautiful and loyal personal assistant, Lieutenant Remak. I was certain that she meant for us the share the bottle. It was a very fine and potent vintage. That situation always made me sad. I just couldn’t feel more for her than friendship though I knew she would be very good for me. It was a credit to her that she still considered me a friend and insisted on remaining in my squad despite my lack of response. I only hoped that she didn’t still wish for more. Still, good wine should never be wasted. I opened the bottle then poured two glasses. Vincent raised a golden brow when I set a glass in front of him along with the bottle. “It’s good for you,” I said, raising my glass. Vincent picked up his glass and sipped the wine just as I did.He licked his lips and sighed appreciatively. “Nice,” he murmured. I raised a brow at him. He shrugged with a small smile. “I learned about wine and beer while I was away.Will you make the rice?” He poured some of the wine into the pan with the meat and vegetables. I took out my rice cooker and did as I was asked. “Come here and taste this,” Vincent said after I started the cooker. He held up a spoon covered in sauce. I gently grasped his wrist to guide his hand. Our eyes met as I tasted the sauce. His golden eyes dilated as I licked the spoon. “Hmmmm,” I murmured. “It’s very good.” Vincent’s mouth fell open as he watched. His breathing hitched, and my fingers tightened around his wrist of their own accord. “I didn’t think your eyes could get any darker,” he whispered, swallowing hard. “You’ve watched my eyes, Vincent?” I whispered in return as I stepped closer to him. “How else would I know how much trouble I was in back then?” I smiled at him. “How much trouble are you in now?” He tried to glare at me. “I’m the rookie here. Will you just do something?” “So much for my carefully planned seduction,” I sighed stepping almost flush with him. “Dammit, Rick...” I took his mouth then. I’d always wanted to shut him up mid-tirade, but I’d never dreamed it would be while claiming such a delicious kiss. That sauce with the wine was really nice on his tongue. His mouth was hot and sweet. His lips trembled with the newness of the kiss just before he opened for my tongue. I wondered if this was his first kiss. I hoisted him up on the counter so that he was above my head. Vincent deepened the kiss as I undid his ponytail and sank my fingers into that thick, silken mass. Hardcase may have been a rookie in this, but he was always a lightning fast study. He was ravaging my mouth with that deadly tongue and weakening my knees by the time the rice cooker clicked off. Vincent tore his lips from mine, but I had him by that glorious mane of hair. He wasn’t getting far. Those hooded amber eyes met mine as we panted at each other. “Supper’s ready,” Vincent rasped. Lord, I didn’t want to let him go, but I did. Patience was something I always harped on when Vincent was in my squad. I couldn’t give in to the intense wave of lust washing over me. I reluctantly released his hair then set him on his feet. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. I wanted to grab him again; he looked so beautiful in that aroused state. I took a deep breath myself. “I’ll dish the rice.” “Okay...thanks,” he murmured. We took our plates and the wine to the dining room and dug into the meal. I sighed after the first taste. “This is really good,” I said appreciatively. “Thank you.” Vincent smiled shyly. “I like to earn my keep.” We ate in comfortable silence for a few moments. I sensed that Vincent was watching me, but didn’t say anything. “You didn’t seem surprised to find me in that fight,” he said. “Let’s see, a fiery cataclysm from the bowels of hell...where else would you turn up?” I chuckled. Vincent smiled a small smile. “I tried to stop it from getting here.” I was certain he had tried mightily and was broken-hearted to have failed to prevent the hellacious attack. “I know you did, Vincent,” I said holding his gaze with mine. “Forgive my selfishness, but I cannot help being glad you are here no matter the circumstances.” “I’m glad to be back,” he admitted. “I never thought I could be so alone for so long...Still, I don’t know why it’s also hard for me being back. I feel unsettled...” “I understand,” I said. And I did. He nodded at that then went back to his meal. After savoring the last of the wine, we cleaned up the kitchen. Vincent left me to sprawl on the sofa while I considered options for a hot after-dinner drink. I thought about coffee, but decided neither one of us needed to be wound up. I spotted some cocoa in the pantry. There was fresh milk and cream, so I made enough for a mug apiece. I also added a shot of good cognac for a kick. Vincent looked tempting sprawled across half my sofa. He was quietly regarding the fire. His amber eyes looked more golden in that light. His softly mussed hair reflected the reds and orange. “Have some hot cocoa,” I said offering the mug. “Cocoa?” Vincent snorted. “Are you going to tuck me in and read me a story, too?” “I’m having some as well, Hardcase,” I replied. “And this has a real kick to it.” He took a sip and his eyes widened. “You’re one twisted man, Rik.” I settled next to my new companion with a chuckle. He moved closer so that our shoulders touched. “How did you leave things with your brother and the Saxls?” “They were confused,” he replied. “Confused?” He laughed softly. “About wanting to come to you.We fought a lot, Colonel.” “They thought I would harm you?” “They thought we would fight all the time,” he explained. “We won’t fight all the time. We have to sleep.” He smiled at that. “I think they were hurt that I needed more than they can give.” “Yeah...my squad has been the same for the most part – well. Some of them. The sane ones.” We sipped our drinks in silence. It was very soothing. So was Vincent’s presence. “What are we doing here, Rik?” He asked. “How will this work?” “We’ll probably fight and laugh and cry,” I replied. “We’ll let each other be raw and moody and angry.” “Will we be lovers?” He asked in a very soft voice. His gaze remained fixed on the fire. “I want that very much,” I admitted easily. “Why?” I looked at his profile in the soft light. “Aside from your being beautiful, Vincent, something felt incredibly right when I held you on the battlefield.I haven’t felt something that right in a very long time. But I don’t want to be another person pushing you.” He rested his golden head on my shoulder then and put his free hand on my thigh. We sipped our drinks in silence for a time, enjoying the last of the fire. “For once, you pushed just right,” he whispered. “What do you want for breakfast?” I asked feeling extremely happy. “My omelets are pretty good.” “Let’s eat out. We can do the marketing then and get the news of the day,” he replied. “I get the newspapers, Vincent.” “But café news is the news of the people,” he replied peeking up at me through the veil of hair. “Best intelligence there is, and there are tasty white sausages.” I made a note to buy tasty white sausages, so we could sleep in now and then. However, I had to guard against the strong temptation of trying to keep him all to myself.Vincent meant a great deal to a lot of people, and despite his current skittishness, he needed that attention to fully heal. “Let’s ask Bobby and Jenn to breakfast,” I suggested as I took the mugs to rinse out. “They can see for themselves that we haven’t beat each other unconscious.” Vincent snorted at that causing me to smile again. When I came out to the living room, I spied Vincent yawning. I offered my hand to pull him off the sofa and into the bedroom. “The room gets chilly once the fire dies down, but I have plenty of blankets. “I have you,” he replied with a shrug. “You felt really warm even through the uniform – must be the energy flow.” “Alright. I’ll change in the bathroom.” “Why?” He asked mildly. “Get shy on me, Colonel?” “Brat,” I murmured as I pulled my shirt from my waistband. “I was trying to be considerate.” “Don’t strain yourself,” he retorted. “You’re a ruthless bastard who takes what he wants. Don’t get soft on me.” He was using my own words against me and in the most unexpected circumstances. I was amused and really turned on. “Oh, I am far from soft, Vincent,” I murmured grasping his waist pulling him against me. He moaned into my mouth melting into me even while he struggled with my clothing. That was my Vincent, always giving as good as he got. Somehow, we managed to undress each other during that long, hungry kiss. When I finally had his lean, muscular body splayed across my bed, Vincent was panting breathlessly while eyeing me like we were in the midst of a spar. I sensed that this time, he didn’t want to pin me. Vincent wanted me to overwhelm him – to take him out of himself. And he wanted to learn. Our fiercest battles happened when the kid wanted to push the limits of his skills. It appeared that we detested each other, and that Vincent was intent on destroying me. I had always known better. “Lord, you are beautiful,” I whispered before kissing him again. This kiss was slow and gentle as I lay on my side next to him with one leg over his slim, corded thigh. I caressed him slowly, running my hand over his skin and learning where he was sensitive to touch. The young man was very responsive. He moaned and his breath hitched often as my fingers moved across his body. His skin was satin over honed muscles and warming under my caress. Touching him was as addictive as kissing him. I raised my lips from his to gauge how he was responding. His eyes were dilated and dreamy; his lips were slightly reddened. I moved to taste the skin along his throat. Vincent gasped as I gently sucked on the curve between his neck and shoulder. He was very sensitive in those places, so I was careful to not cause discomfort. Fortunately, much of Vincent’s skin had many areas that sparked intense arousal. Flicking his nipples made him arch off the bed. Lapping his adorable navel made him writhe beneath me. I couldn’t get enough of the sounds he was making. But with Vincent, his mouth was a blessing and a curse. “Dammit, you sadist,” he rasped. “Finish me or so help me...” I took his erection in my mouth to the root savoring his taste and his shape and the satiny feel of his skin. Even there he was satin over steel. I wanted to do so much more that night. I had notions about taking him slowly with my mouth. But my Vincent would not allow that. He was so responsive that I couldn’t resist bringing him to climax. “Oh. My. God, Rik!” he moaned before releasing in my mouth. I took all he had, sucking him until he was limp. I was tired, but still horny and unsure of how to proceed. My beautiful lover had completely flummoxed me. I had barely caught my breath when those strong arms were pulling me up his prone body to kiss me thoroughly. One of Vincent’s elegant hands had me by my hair while he ravaged my mouth. My unattended erection throbbed painfully against his leg. I gazed at him when he ended the kiss. He looked incredible in that state of bliss. “You look like an angel,” I whispered. “Fuck me, Rik.” An angel with a potty mouth. He kissed me again, arching against me. “You want to, I know...I want you to...I need you to...” Any misgivings fled my brain along with the rest of my blood. I couldn’t refuse him anything, I realized. “You’ll have to relax,” I murmured. Vincent chuckled. “I have no bones. How much more can I relax?” I reached for lube in my nightstand and slicked my fingers. “You’ll have to trust me...” “Rik, I’m naked in your bed with my legs open waiting to get banged,” he replied in exasperation. “I don’t think trust is a problem.” There was no reply for that, so I gently but firmly pressed my fingers inside him. We kissed until I felt him relax against my fingers. Then, I began to stretch him, searching for his sweet spot. I knew when I found it. Vincent’s slim, muscular body nearly bowed off the mattress, and he cried out into the kiss. “Ah...dammit, Rik...please...” There was no resisting the plea in that husky, needy voice. This beautiful, blond angel was writhing beneath me begging for my body. I quickly slicked my erection, and then pushed into him praying that I wouldn’t explode as soon as I was inside his tight heat. “Look at me, Vincent. I want to see your eyes...” The golden eyes were intense. Everything he was feeling was there for me to see, and it took my breath away.
“I can’t believe that you’re here and you’re mine,” I said haltingly. “You are mine, aren’t you?” “Ah...Rik...yes...yes...please...” “You will let me have you the way I want, but tonight...” I growled shifting my hips and thrusting in earnest. I grasped Vincent’s awakened erection and stroked him in tandem with my thrusts. His mouth fell open as I hit his sweet spot over and over. All of his barriers, his bravado fell away before me. I saw the vulnerable, untried young man trusting me not to hurt him. He couldn’t help me, but I didn’t mind. There was something satisfying about taking Vincent during our first time. We would make love the next time. This time, I was claiming him. It didn’t take long. He felt too good and sounded too good, and I had been alone too long. He climaxed just before I did. We cried out in unison, our gazes locked. Something powerful and tangible passed between us. I knew we were connected in a profound way. I collapsed on him afterward. Vincent held me, while lazily rubbing my back. “My Lord...do I get to do that to you?” he asked breathlessly, squeezing me briefly. “Absolutely,” I sighed. “As often as possible.” “Good...” That touched me. He touched me even more when he tried to stop me from leaving the bed. “W-where are you going?” I kissed him gently. “I’m just getting some things to clean us up.” “Oh...okay...”
I quickly cleaned myself then fetched some towels and a basin of hot water. Vincent sighed as I wiped him down then gently dried his skin. My lover seemed to be asleep when I finally settled beside him and pulled the blankets over our bodies. But he surprised me by easing his body over mine then sighed as I embraced him. “Goodnight, Vincent,” I said softly. “Hmmmm...’night, Rik” I fell asleep easily enough, but the dream still came. I knew it was a dream, but I couldn’t prevent the images from terrifying me. There was death all around, and I couldn’t stop it. All the power I possessed was useless. People just kept dying. I awoke with a violent start, breathing hard. Strong arms tightened around me. A downy cheek rubbed against my chest. “S’okay...just a dream...” “I know,” I whispered caressing his back.“Sorry to wake you.” “Want to talk about it?” “No...not right now...I just want to feel you,” I replied. “Feel away,” he murmured. I knew he was smiling against my skin. I caressed his back and stroked his hair. “Did you want me this way when I was in your squad?” He asked softly after a little while. I squeezed him. “I wanted to throttle you most of the time back then. No, I didn’t realize how much I wanted you until you were heading away from me toward all that fire.” “I thought about you while I was away,” he admitted. “I realized that you always trusted me.” “Hmmm?” “You always gave me important work and trusted me to make my own way,” he explained softly. “That experience saved me many times in that place.” “You had great instincts and are very strong,” I replied. “And you have uncanny luck.” “Yeah, I guess. But you were the only one who never babied me,” he replied. “I think I felt something for you even before I was taken away.” “Is that why you were intent on punching me in the face?” “Hey! I was a kid. I didn’t know what to say to you,” he retorted. “You might have laughed.” “Never, Hardcase. Laughing at you was dangerous,” I chuckled squeezing him. “I could never have responded then. You were very young, and I was your squad leader.” “I’m glad I’m not so young anymore.” “In this instance, I am, too.” I yawned then. Vincent settled back on my chest. “Go to sleep, Rik. I’ve got you.”
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